🧠 Brain Emoji

Orexinomics is a personal excavation, exploration, experiment. Though I’ve got some writing chops, I have not yet wholly honored nor shared them. This newsletter is an endeavor to change that: to establish regular, accessible creative output. I’ve made many previous attempts, but this one, for reasons both legible and opaque, just feels a bit different. (I’m no longer a chaotic, under-medicated 19 year-old, for one). I’m here to prove that I can show up for writing, that cultivation and attendance to craft is nourishing, self- sustaining and refining. That legible, unified themes are organic, emergent properties of portfolio generation. That an audience, however piecemeal or hypothetical, is a constructive and integral component of art making. That I actually love doing this stuff.

Of my previously internet-published writings, those that have made the biggest splashes were motivated, at least in part, by vindictive anger. These experiences were illuminating insofar as they revealed to me an ability to affect and effect a broad audience. And while I hope Orexinomics will reaffirm and foster said capacity for influence, I long to relinquish rage, grievance as impetus. I’m here to nurture and heal my relationship with the craft, to establish a discipline that is neither striving nor romantic nor harsh. To work and share in the spirit and service of unconditional, impersonal love.

I’ve given myself a quota of a weekly post, be it fiction, poetry or prose. Some of these posts will be recycled from earlier creative exploits, but I trust that as I get into the rhythm, fresh and recent work will come to dominate.

Stick around, if you like. See what I discover.

You can learn more about me, @ottomanbob, at my website.

What’s in a name?

Orexin, also known as hypocretin, is a recently discovered neurotransmitter that regulates arousal, wakefulness, motivation, and appetite. It is considered by some scientists to be the “king” neurotransmitter. Due to my (type 2) narcolepsy, my brain either does not produce orexin or is unable to utilize it. Can’t be sure.

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Secular filmmaker seeks theosis, convexity.


ottomanbob.com (ft. gaudy boasts) wordy filmmaker seeks thesis via virtue. not a rationalist.